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The space around me is a tunnel of dark matter. I feel like I am floating in a gel like substance, my spirit distal in relation to my broken body. Like a rubber ball attached to a paddle, I was snapping back and forth between my sleeping form and my transcendental self. I could hear unrecognizable voices. They seemed to be trying to figure out who I was. In the next moment someone was playing a harp and singing for the revelers. I heard someone say my name, “Cassie Evans, the police located her driver’s license. Her name is Cassie Evans.” The voices started to fade again back to the music. I just couldn’t seem to stay in one place long enough.
I was feeling a rush of emotion. Panic not for my dying body but for the many dying bodies, I had glimpsed in his mind’s eye. I was unilaterally drawn to and from this man, this creature, this conundrum of colorful darkness. He was lovely but deadly and I knew that I was the only one to know this.
Snapping back again, “Evans,” I thought, “I am not an Evans. I have never been an Evans. My last name is Clary. What am I doing here?” I yelled! No one heard me, no one is responding to me. I have to get out of here. I just did not know how to go about it. Was it a matter of performing a gedankenexperiment; would I have to try to leave this place experimentally from my own mind? I just did not know. I wanted to pursue this evil plenipotent man and his retinue with every fiber of my being.
I felt myself struggling, willing myself to leave this teeter totter state of consciousness. I could see the vacuous tunnel, it was dark except fibers of light seemed to be fading further and further away. I noticed another entrance, another frame from it nothing hung, not a door but just a curtain of wavy light filled with the liquid gel matter. Fibers of carmine, magenta, vermilin and amethyst were swirling just the other side of the frame. I needed to get back to the party and the otherworldly revelers. I felt certain of that but I just couldn’t seem to manage it. I was drawn to the swirling fibers the colors so brilliant they had me mesmerized.
I turn back to face myself and I realize I was looking down at my own battered body. I wasn’t going anywhere that was for sure. Tubes and monitors were humming and beeping all around me. People were rushing in and through me; all the while a tintinnabulation of mechanical noises elevated a sense of urgency in the people working on me.
I was flipping back and forth when…
To be continued